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The Harry Dunn Hook Up Method
When going to a bar / club / party setting you may have a friend who is either the Alpha Male, group leader or the asshole. You know who I am referring to, the guy who calls dibs on a chick but uses you to go get her for him. Everyone has the one guy friend who goes to Creasers Palace and comes back like he’s a fucking world citizen or something. This guy really thinks he’s too cool for school but he’s really the guy who wets his bed with false bravado. This guy is the classic big hat no cattle kind of guy who is nothing more than a bag of douche. However, you can get laid at his expense by using the Harry Dunn Hook Up Method. I developed the Harry Dunn Method when I went out with a new group of people and the alpha / asshole of that particular group thought he was better than me or something (yea right I’m awesome). He proceeded to tell |
| Dumb & Dumber
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me to go over to this hot chick standing by the bar and introduce her to him. He actually gave me a push on the shoulder in her direction and basically told me to fetch. I was actually going to slap his nuts as hard as I could but then I thought of Harry Dunn from the movie Dumb and Dumber and it all made sense to me. I told him that is was no problem and walked over to her with a plan that was so good that it could feed all the people in Bangladesh.
As I was walking over to this obvious 9 on the scale of hotness chick, I knew I was going to make that container of self righteous douche bag get me the girl instead. So I walked over to the bar and squeezed in next to her and looked over at the alpha / asshole guy. He gave me a nod as though it was alright for me to speak to her. I gave him a goofy ass thumbs up and began my conversation with this green eyed blond.
I said to her, "Excuse me, do you see that guy over there in the dark blue polo"? She said, "Yes". "He wanted me to come over here to introduce you to him but he is a complete self absorbed jock douche bag who pops his collar out and denies he listens to Kenny G during the holidays". She started to laugh hysterically and then I pointed at him and said, "Now seriously was I lying, look at him, doesn't he belong on some reject VH1 reality TV show about what not to do in life"? She laughed again with “lulz” and I said, "Well he has no idea that I called him out on being a self indulgent wiener would you like to go talk some where else"? She said sad yes absolutely".
In this scenario I had discovered how to combat evil by sabotaging the asshole who wanted me to do his Ground Work for him. The asshole’s method may have worked in the 1980's but is no longer fashionable self serving someone else's penis dessert. I then realized this method could be used for both good and evil (fact or fiction) by figuratively creating the asshole in question every time I went out on the town. The best part is there doesn’t have to be a real asshole. You can make anyone standing around who looks like a tool the asshole and clown him to a chick whose honor you are supposedly preserving. However in the end it feels good knowing you actually sabotaged a guy who deserved it much like Harry Dunn did Lloyd in the movie Dumb and Dumber. | | | | | | | Origins Of The Harry Dunn Method
The Harry Dunn method came to be when Lloyd (Jim Carrey) wanted Harry (Jeff Daniels) to introduce him to Mary (Lauren Holly).It was kin of a weak move no to be able to do the ground work yourself but in Lloyd's case, he had previously banged Harry's girlfriend in the fictional story line. So that's why what Harry did was so funny. The best part about this method is you don't need to bring a douche bag loser friend to take advantage of. There will be plenty circling around the club, bar or party. Just pick one that looks abnormally assholic and find the girl you are suppose to introduce him to. Crash Course Tips
1. Pick out a douche bag loser. This person can be anyone, in fact it works better when it is a complete stranger. That way you can make up anything about them and not feel guilty. 2. Find a hottie at the bar to go run the game on. Remember you can play the Numbers Game as well and use this 3 or 4 times before you get a bite on the hook. 3. When you make First Substantial Contact with a chick have your script of sabotage material ready. You can rehearse the night before and think about the biggest asshole you know and basically clown him to this girl who "supposedly" sent you over thereto talk to her. | | |
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