Do You Miss Me At All?

I have a friend who met a girl through a friend and they hit it off. When I say hit if off, I mean he realized that he could bang this chick within 2 weeks hit if off. However, she seemed to have been a nice girl and in her late 20's who was very eager to please. Warning warning, baby maker on board with ticking time bomb of settling down syndrome! My friend told me the background of this chick and I said that he may have a stage 5 clinger on his hands. He said, "I don't care as long as I crush this brod I can deal with it". I responded by saying, "Yea but she will make you work for it old friend and probably want to hang out when 24 is on too". He gave me a weird look and said, whatever I'm still gonna get the puss puss.

I get an im (that's instant message) from my friend conveying that he sealed the deal with this chick. To be exact he typed, "THE EAGLE HAS LANDED" conveying he crushed it. I laughed and was just waiting for when the weirdness started to creep in on him. Apparently this girl would bring him dinner, clean his condo, wait on him hand and foot and he was in hog heaven. He also revealed that they haven't even had the conversation yet! The conversation is when a man and woman state their terms of the relationship concerning exclusivity and what is in store for a serious relationship. I always had a rule that if you banged a girl before "The Conversation" has taken place then there was no contract to be broken and you would be on the moral high ground if you wanted to bounce after sampling the goods. You can exercise your buyers remorse clause of a relationship and walk away with no strings attached (in theory).

The problem arises when the girl who foolishly tried to buy the relationship with Sex goes stone cold fuck nuts on you. She slowly starts to realize that the guy is not as into her as she is into him. She then start to constantly think about why she had sex with him so fast and begins to bring it up indirectly in conversations normally over the phone or when you are about to go to sleep together. She will randomly but frequently ask questions like, "Do you miss me", Are you thinking about me", "did you enjoy making Love to me"? The worst of this occurrence is when the crazy bitch asks you this publically in front of your friends or even a bartender for Christ sakes. At this point, Maverick is yelling at Goose about trying to reach the ejection panel so he can fucking get out of there.

When a girls biological clock starts ticking she is always susceptible to fucking a guy really quickly thinking that will make him like her. These girls often forget to make the guy work for it by stating the terms of the relationship first. The truth is, guys want a Women who covets her va j j not some burn out insecure slag who gives it up thinking she can bribe him with pussy for the long haul. If you have dated a girl for less than 3 weeks and she is already asking you if you miss her on a Monday morning after you spent the weekend with her, then get the hell out of there! A stage 5 clinger is on the loose and you have to abandon ship before she sabotages all your life boats!